Sunday, January 15




Green Eggs & Ham (hocks)?



Do you like green eggs and ham?
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.
I do not like green eggs and ham...

Somebody's having an acid flashback, and I swear it's not me!
It's those mad scientists in Taiwan.
Or maybe the one tripping is the smi-i-i-ling GREEN hocker in the middle here, created by the Dr. Frankensteins over in Taiwan.


Or maybe it's YOUR brain on drugs. 'Cause put 'em under black lights and this is what you get:

Yup! Believe it or not, Ripley, the planet now has its first-ever green, glow-in-the-dark pigs. Green skin, green hearts, green brains, green snouts, green booties, green uhhn!

Something is real wrong with this picture. First the Supreme Court gives Bush the election. Then no WMD in Iraq. Now this: Three little (green!) pigs. This is the real Surreal Life. Only I can't tell who's tweaking the hardest: us staring at the pig, or the one pig laughing at us.

Cross-breeding with jellyfish is what made these piggly wigglies fluorescent this way. This will allegedly aid stem cell research. But didn't these people see Jurassic Park? Keep porking around with Mother Nature, and she will make lunch meat of us! Yeah, that cute one's hamming for the camera now, but come at him with a butcher's knife and that sucker probably turns fatal as a squealing Velociraptor.

Look at 'em, really. Their bodies look a little like this Pit Bull's, don't they?


I'm giving up meat. For real. I ain't eating no ish that might bite back. So again I ask,


Do you like green eggs and ham?
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.
I do not like green eggs and ham...



Clicks to Miles Davis catalog, but explore as you like

7 Comments:

Anonymous UDAMAN said...

another fun posting, viqi...

UDAMAN
1/16/06

10:27 PM  
Blogger Viqi French said...

glad you like. although i'm sure its leaning toward the wrong side of politics for you. :-)

2:33 AM  
Anonymous UDAMAN said...

lol...


UDAMAN
1/13/06

8:07 AM  
Blogger Viqi French said...

uda,

you're probably a staunch advocate for Pit Bulls and green pigs. lol

8:15 AM  
Anonymous UDAMAN said...

...green pigs...well yes....Pit Bulls....uh...no


UDAMAN
1/16/06

8:51 PM  
Blogger Viqi French said...

well, we agree on one thing: Pits aren't happening.

my neighor's Pit is 11 yrs. old, feeble and predicted to die in a few months.

while i feel sad for my neighbor and the loving relationship he'll lose with his "best friend," i only let the Pit get close enuf to sniff my knee for the 1st time yesterday, knowing he was too weak to attack me.

mind you, i love dogs madly. have a heart-felt connection with most of them. but these Pit kiddies i just don't trust. too many horror stories that you just don't hear about any other breed.

6:15 AM  
Anonymous UDAMAN said...

viqi:

...tru dat, viqi...boston terriers can be a terror also...one of my staff members had one that had been nibblin' on their sheltie like Rastus on a corn cob!...they finally got rid of the terrier...


UDAMAN
1/16/06

7:40 AM  

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