Monday, February 6

Monday Morning Super-back: An ADD re-cap

There was a time when I could follow a football season all the way through. But those days are long gone. Now, I only watch the Super Bowl. And even that, I just can't stay properly focused on.

So I enjoyed watching my one, big game of the year last night. And here's why, as enjoyed in my own Adult ADD way:

5. For the first time in a long time, the game was actually better than the commercials. A nice enough number of interceptions and touch downs vs. generally lackluster ads tipped the scale this time, making me watch the old-fashioned way... I stayed put for an entire 60% the game, and for a change, dashed away from the TV for 60% of the commercials.

4. Best commercial I caught was for the Hummer H3, with Godzilla and the Gilla Monster (or whomever those Japanese monsters were). These enemy gigantors came together to duke it out, but wound up dating, doing the nasty, getting pregnant and ultimately giving birth to that Little Monster of a truck, the H3. Isn't love grand, a real gas guzzler... Me love 'em long time!

I also liked the Sprint (phone as dangerous, head-clunking weapon) and Burger King (Buzby Berkley fifties choreography) joints. But let me just say, that Burger King 'King' is the grossest looking character ever. Why would anyone eat anything from the platter of that creepy looking mascot? The Burger King looks like something vying for a starring role in the next horror movie franchise. Move over Freddie Krugger and Jason, the papier macher zombie King has come, looking like Mick Jagger in drag.

The worst ads I caught? The two Ameriquest spots. It's not that they were "horrible." Both were entertaining enough. But as a marketing person, I didn't feel the elaborate set up scenarios were strongly summarized by the ending copy points. I had to think too long about what it was that Ameriquest wanted me, a potential customer, to know about their services. In commercial land, you've got 30 seconds to sell the viewer. So at $2.4 million per Super Bowl spot, it should behoove a marketer to leave a fast and clear understanding of your benefits before the next guy comes up to punt.

3. In the absence of Janet Jackson and her star-spangled mams, I found other sexy tidbits to amuse me. A female announcer talked about a damaged player, that someone was pulling down his pants to tape up his groin. Yummy freaky stuff!!! Now I'm all for women sportscasters, but... this chick almost sounded as if she'd crunch a linebacker for the honor of ripping off that poor man's injury tape. Yeeeeoouuuuch!

2. The Star Spangled Horror. The Saturday Night Live skit predicting this mess was far more entertaining. (Keenan portraying an attitudinal Aretha: You betta think THINK! Think about gittin' me some biscuits!)

The highlight of the actual Star Spangled Banner? Condi Rice in the stands, happily grappling with the notion of whether to do a Janet Jackson. Yes sports fans, Conda-Sheezy was toying with her boob. Oh wait: she was just being patriotic, hand over heart for her country? Well, why didn't the camera show another soul in the stadium with hand-to-heart? Guess that sort of thing has become passe.

1. When I saw Mick Jagger toss what appeared to be a pair of panties back into the crowd -- gasp! -- I realized that a certain, craggly Rolling Stone was no longer equipped to gather moss. But what else would one expect from a 63-year-old, emaciated rock man running an Olympics-sized stage in geriatric Reeboks? And that heebie-jeebie prancing? The English (Burger) King moved like his Depends were besieged by crickets.

Clicks to Miles Davis catalog, but explore as you like


Anonymous UDAMAN said...


I liked the Hummer ad the best too...


9:18 PM  
Blogger Viqi French said...

yes, wasn't the H3 ad the best? it pulled you right in, from the very first frame and just kept developing a great 'love story'.

8:35 AM  
Blogger said...

peace french..

yo- i too noticed condaskeeza in the stands.. who is she foolin?!!??! lol.. but yea yo- NFL is not the jumpoff no more.. i remember back in the day day the superbowl use to be THE SHIT!!!! maybe its cuz my team was niccce!! (49ers)!!!

but truth be told.. my fondest memories of 'building' with my pops was watching superbowl games in the 90s... whats really good these days?!?!!?

1:55 PM  
Anonymous UDAMAN said...

bro akintoye:

Why are you dissin' sista Condi? Is your CONFUSION so profound that you cannot bring yourself to APPRECIATE the greater variety of beautiful people in the BLACK garden?

Are we so hung up on the formulaic approach to being 'black' (what they will allow) that we have to MOCK any black who doesn't fit our nigga/ghetto ideal?

Condi always made it a date to see the Super Bowl with her late father, Reverend John Wesley Rice ...another mentor of the Civil Rights movement...and she more than likely has forgotten more football stats than your mind would ever hold.

She was engaged to Denver Broncos Receiver Rick Upchurch at one time: can you compete wit dat?

So your dissin reminds me of the fox who couldn't leap high enough to reach the he just called them sour instead.


7:11 PM  
Anonymous Wutzle said...

I didnt get the chance to watch the game this year. :( Wutzle is the new blog directory! Check it out!

8:58 AM  
Blogger The Humanity Critic said...

great post..

12:14 PM  

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